In the few months I’ve been modding at fuckyeahasexual and touring ace Tumblr, there’s been a very. Steady. Stream of info that detail horrifically abusive situations and overall poor mental unhealth. Two a week in the inbox if I’m lucky, usually around seven-ten.
And there’s been so many, I can officially categorize all 500+ of these kinds of asks and submissions into an extensive bulletlist of Why Asexual Exclusionary Radicalism Is Incredibly Toxic And Shitty;
Coming Out To Family, Friends, And Employers
“My parents keep telling me that I’m something else, and it’s making me doubt my sense of judgement, not just about my sexual identity, but also about everything in general.”
“My family, friends, and co-workers keep referring to me as an inanimate object in a manner that’s clearly meant to humiliate and devastate me. Nothing I say will get them to stop.”
“My parents vocally/bodily forced me to undergo medical examinations, some of them concerning my sexual organs, many of them concerning blood tests and other trauma-centric procedures.”
“My family is intervening with my private life by changing my schedule to include exercise, socialization, friend influences, and whatever they think can ‘change’ me.”
“My friends/co-workers no longer respect my bodily boundaries when I came out to them, because they no longer see me as someone who should be respected. They regularly touch, fondle, grope, and prod me without permission, and/or verbally harass me, and don’t take my objections seriously.”
“My family, friends, and co-workers no longer just harass me, but also anyone I’m currently dating because they view my significant other as pathetic, underserved, or even being abused.”
First Few Days Of Dating
“My date got irrationally angry and confrontational when I came out to them, in a manner that made me fearful.” (SO many of these.)
“My date immediately lost any respect they had for my boundaries, no longer asked for consent, and {tried to} force themselves upon me.” (A lot of these, too)
“My date tried to verbally circumvent any boundaries and issues I confessed to, and it made me feel like I was in danger.”
“I didn’t come out to my date at first, and when they found out, they radically changed their behavior in an attempt to control and manipulate our new relationship to their benefit.”
Long-Term Relationships
“My partner has forcefully and radically changed our long-term relationship after finding out about my asexuality, and I’m now trapped and controlled in a way that I wasn’t before.”
“My partner broke up with me/is fighting with me because of my asexuality, and trying to make it seem like I’m hurting them. It’s made me doubt myself and my ability to trust my own intentions.”
“My partner is slowly changing from what was once supportive of my asexuality, and I’m wondering when I have the right to be worried and when I’d be overreacting. I’m aware of the worst case scenario, but I also worry that I’m being selfish and childish – which are things I’ve been told all throughout my asexual experience.”
Self-Care And Self Development
“I don’t trust my ability to say either yes or no in sexual situations, and this has extended to my life in general. I don’t feel comfortable in my ability to self-determinate.”
“The lack of authority, definition, and schooling of the concept of asexuality has made me very uncomfortable with what I think I am, and that uncertainty haunts me every waking moment.”
“I think it’s too late/too early to tell if I’m asexual, but the longer I hesitate, the worse my mental health and emotional wellbeing gets. I’m effectively stuck.”
“I see no benefit in coming out, or even identifying as asexual. There’s no positivity, role models, or supportive community for what I consider a big and scary part of my overall identity.”
“I think this was sexual abuse, but I’m wondering if I’m just being selfish and childish.”
“I think I was treated badly by my parents/friends/partner, but I’m wondering if I’m just being selfish and childish.”
“I want to believe that I’m deserving of equal freedom and human respect paid to other, not asexual people, but people tell me I’m being selfish and childish.”
“No one encourages this part of me. And that makes me feel forgotten and abandoned in general.”
Shut the fuck up about your petty beef with tumblr bloggers and youtubers and Archie comics or whatever. I literally do not care, I can’t care. I see these messages every goddamn day – this post was written and drafted a month ago, and I very easily compiled most of this bulletpoint list from scratch, just by eyeing what I see in the askbox and what comes across my dash.
‘Ace discourse’ anger is empty and so meaningless. This is what I see by being part of this one 17k follow asexual ask blog for maybe half a year. I am so Done with all the faux rage posts and all the false positivity about how it’s ok to NOT be ace and all the acephobia that falls perfectly in line with the gaslighting typical of acephobia-101 while also having the audacity to claim it not so.
This is what’s real and I want to bleed it into your goddamn eyes.
Reblogging this again, for obvious reasons
Ace ppl are not INSTITUTIONALLY OR SYSTEMATICALLY OPPRESSED BECAUSE OF THE DEGREE THAT YOU FEEL SEXUAL ATTRACTION. If ur trans ur lgbtq. If ur aro but ur gay, bi, pan ur lgbtq. If ur ace but homo, biromantic etc ur lgbt. Being ace doesnt make u lgbt by default. Does the interpersonal lack of understanding suck and should change? Yeah. But society doesnt want u dead so cishet aces stay tf out our business.
Someone read this, all this stuff about struggles of people coming out as ace, people abusing them and telling them that their identity isn’t real or is a problem to be fixed, making people feel worthless and feeling that they’re in the wrong about their own goddamn identity, and said “nah they ain’t oppressed™ enough to be in a community of people who face the same issues”
U mad huh?
Anyway….aces can’t be systematically opressed. None of those things are examples of systematic oppression
Also nice how they called it “asexual exclusionary radicalism” as if it wasn’t a cheap tactic to compare ace exclusionist to twerfs
Asexuality was listed in the DSM as HSDD (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder) until 2013, making it officially a mental illness that would be treated with therapy and medication. It is still in the DSM, except that you can ‘opt out’ if you self-identify as asexual, which is great except that asexuality is still so unknown that there undoubtedly many people who are asexual but don’t know that it’s “a thing”. This means that who knows how many asexuals have been sent to therapy and told they’re sick, then been “treated” for their orientation to try and force them to experience sexuality “correctly”.
Posts of people describing the hardship they’ve faced for their asexuality:x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x
The blog @acephobia-is-real has so many submissions and examples of hatred, harassment, hostility, and abuse, of aces who have been raped and/or sexually assaulted in an attempt to ‘fix’ them, and made suicidal due to aphobia and/or their own perceived brokenness, that it would be pointless for me to try and link any. Just go and start reading. Try their suicide tag.
There may be dissatisfyingly little research done on asexuality, but there has been enough done to prove that they do face discrimination, no matter how hard some may find that to believe. But guess what? You, an allosexual person, do not get to say shit like “aces don’t get kicked out” or “aces don’t _____” any more than I as a white person get to say that things I don’t experience must not happen to black people either. Just because you haven’t experienced it personally or witnessed it with your own eyes doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. You haven’t walked in an ace’s shoes, you don’t know what they deal with. Period.
Not even other aces can tell asexuals that their experiences aren’t real or aren’t valid. Different people can deal with different amounts of oppression, that doesn’t mean the lack of oppression is the default “truth”.
Nobody is trying to say that asexuals have it “as bad” or worse than gay or trans people, but we don’t HAVE to “have it worse” to beincluded and for our experiences to have merit without being compared to anyone else’s. Let me say that again: our experiences have merit without being compared to anyone else’s.
Told asexuals to die: x, x, x, x, x (tbh this is only a tiny sample and I don’t have the heart to go digging for more)
Are all aphobes this vile? Maybe not, but this is still the disgusting, hateful attitude festering in the gatekeeping community, and it stinks like shit. The examples I have provided above are only a fraction of the harassment and abuse that is perpetrated on a regular basis.
“Het aces/aroaces are straight”
Some het aces identify as straight. Some het aces don’t identify as straight, they identify as asexual, and it’s not your place to label them against their will. There is no world in which aroaces, people who experience no attraction to anyone, are straight.
“We accept SGA (same-gender attracted) and trans aces”
Firstly, SGA (same-gender attraction) is a term that was used and is still used in Mormon conversion therapy, so as one can understand,a lot of people are very uncomfortable being labeled with this description. Secondly, it enforces a gender binary of “same” and “opposite” gender that leaves a large number of nonbinary people out in the cold. Is a genderfluid person only “same-gender attracted” if they’re attracted to other genderfluid people who are genderfluid in exactly the same way? How about agender, intergender, demigirl/boy people? And before the argument “well they’re included as trans” is made, there are plenty of nonbinary people who do not identify as trans. I’m one of them.
The standard of “SGA and trans” as requirement for entry to the LGBTQ community is used nowhere outside of aphobic tumblr, and it seems crafted specifically for the purpose of excluding aces, aros, NBs, intersex people, and others not deemed “gay enough”.
The modern American movement was first known as the “gay community” when cis gay men refused to even accept lesbians, then the “gay and lesbian community”. (Good reading on the subject.)
“After the elation of change following group action in the Stonewall riots in New York, in the late 1970s and the early 1980s, some gays and lesbians became less accepting of bisexual or transgender people. Critics said that transgender people were acting out stereotypes and bisexuals were simply gay men or lesbian women who were afraid to come out and be honest about their identity. Each community has struggled to develop its own identity including whether, and how, to align with other gender and sexuality-based communities, at times excluding other subgroups; these conflicts continue to this day.” (source)
“From about 1988, activists began to use the initialism LGBT in the United States. Not until the 1990s within the movement did gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people gain equal respect.” (ibid)
Insisting that LG people have always been accepting of bi and trans people is incredibly revisionist and does a great deal of injustice to those who have been excluded.
Despite the fact that bisexual and transgender people have always been around, and have done great things for the community, they have faced a great deal of lateral oppression from the LG part of the group that did not want to see them get an equal share of attention, support, or legitimacy. This post is not about proving LG transphobia and biphobia, but it’s so rampant that I don’t feel like I need to provide sources whatsoever. Nevertheless, here’s a collection of biphobia, and the blog@terf-calloutdocuments some of the violent transphobia on this site, particularly in the lesbian community. This post is an example.
“The A stands for Ally so that closeted people can be the community without being outed”
No one is saying that we don’t care about closeted people, but a) even if you’re a closeted L, G, B, or T, you are still a L, G, B, or T. Allies do not need to be part of the acronym to be intrinsically welcomed. As someone said, this is like saying the ‘B’ in BLT stands for ‘bread’. We can pretty much safely assume that a sandwich is going to include bread, we don’t have to go of our way to give it a letter. Either you are outing every “ally” as a closeted queer person, or you are giving 100% cis straight people an LGBTQ member card, the very thing you are arguing against by trying to exclude asexuals.
Furthermore, this puts forth the argument “I’m willing to let cishet straight people into the community for the sake of a few closeted people” while at the same time stating “I’m not willing to let the A stand for asexuals because I don’t think letting cis heteroromantic asexuals into the community is worth giving all asexuals representation and support”. Which says that you consider asexuals less valuable and more of a threat than cis straight people.
“I have proof of an asexual being homophobic/transphobic/racist/a terrible person”
Of course there are asexuals who are terrible people. There are legions of gays and lesbians who are racist and transphobic. Does that make them not gay/lesbian? Does their bigotry invalidate their sexual orientation, or remove the L and G from the acronym? No, I don’t think so. Some asexuals being bad people doesn’t justify you trying to invalidate all of us.
“’Allosexual’ is a bad word because ____”
I actually have an ‘allosexual’ tag just for posts about why ‘allosexual’ is a perfectly fine word: x, x, x, x, x. x
“The split-attraction model is homophobic”
What we call the split-attraction model was first described by Karl Heinrich Ulrichs, a gay advocate from the 1800s, as “disjunctive uranodioning”. (source) (credit to this post)
“The term ‘corrective rape’ was coined by South African lesbians and should only be used by lesbians”
No one means any disrespect to lesbians or other victims of corrective rape, but this is not a correct statement.
“We’ll Show You You’re a Woman” describes the violence directed towards LGBT people in South Africa, stating, “Negative public attitudes towards homosexuality go hand in hand with a broader pattern of discrimination, violence, hatred, and extreme prejudice against people known or assumed to be lesbian, gay, and transgender, or those who violate gender and sexual norms in appearance or conduct (such as women playing soccer, dressing in a masculine manner, and refusing to date men).” It goes on to say, “Much of the recent media coverage of violence against lesbians and transgender men has been characterized by a focus on “corrective rape,” a phenomenon in which men rape people they presume or know to be lesbians in order to “convert” them to heterosexuality.”
The Wikipedia article on corrective rape in South Africa states that, “A study conducted by OUT LGBT Well-being and the University of South Africa Centre for Applied Psychology (UCAP) showed that “the percentage of black gay men who said they have experienced corrective rape matched that of the black lesbians who partook in the study”.”
It is not only lesbians, but also bisexual women, transgender men, gay men, and gender non-conforming people in South Africa who experience corrective rape. This is not in any way meant to minimize the horror of the epidemic or shift attention away from lesbians, but other victims, including asexuals, deserve attention as well. Do not silence or speak over victims of rape by policing their language.
“Aces are valid, they’re just not queer/LGBTQ”
You cannot in one breath say “Asexuals are valid” and in the next deny their experiences. Spend five minutes in the community and you will see testimony after testimony from aces describing their abuse, their sexual assault(s), the countless times people have called them confused, broken, wrong, mentally ill, inhuman, sinful, and how these experiences have left them feeling hopeless, alone, alienated, subhuman, depressed, and suicidal. Almost every asexual out there will tell you a story of how their orientation has caused them pain and struggle, and you can’t call them valid while at the same time calling these experiences invalid and nonexistent.
“Aces take resources from other LGBTQ who need them”
I’ve seen some pretty wild claims about this one, insisting that asexuals “steal” things such as scholarships, beds at homeless shelters, food and space at pride events, suicide hotlines, and so on, yet I have never seen any actual proof that any “stealing” has ever taken place. For one thing, I thought “you’ll never get kicked out or fired for being ace”, “no one is suicidal because they’re asexual”, so why would you think aces need these resources? Either we don’t need them or we don’t use them, you can’t have it both ways.
For another, how heartless do you have to be to tell asexuals that they can’t use suicide hotlines? Do you realize that you’re saying that asexuals should be denied life-saving services? That, in essence, asexuals are suicidal due to their orientation, but you think they’re not “queer enough” so they deserve to die? Because that is the logical progression of refusing someone suicide prevention, and that’s the message aces receive when you tell them they are “stealing” suicide prevention.
Lastly, do you not realize we are alsoPROVIDING resources? We are bringing bodies and minds to the community, we are here to be voices, to volunteer, to bring encouragement, information, and support. We earn our keep. You just have to admit that you don’t WANT us here.
(Thanks to @livebloggingmydescentintomadness for these)
My own contribution:
Living in a world where the media is overflowing with sexual imagery and where society constantly puts value on sexual intercourse, virginity, and related topics – who can forget the phrase ‘sex sells’? – men and women who do not experience sexual attraction (the definition of asexuality) and who are sex-repulsed or masturbation-repulsed (as many asexuals, myself included, are) feel alienated and ‘broken’. We also face erasure in terms of representation, being either grossly underrepresented or represented as cold, harsh, and ‘synonymous with celibate’ people. Let’s not forget erasure from LGBT spaces – I have many times been told that asexuals do not belong in the acronym or in “our spaces”, even though asexuals have the capacity to be homoromantic, biromantic, panromantic, etc, as well as transgender or nonbinary. And, if we don’t belong in LGBT spaces, and we clearly aren’t heterosexual, what do we belong? Nowhere, it seems. Of course, the argument also drifts to “asexuals don’t experience oppression”, which is false.
I got an anon the other day asking how ace people could possibly experience more oppression than someone who is celibate. Here you go.
Long post, but full of resources.
How in the fuck can you scroll through a such a staggering number of examples of the shit ace people get for being ace and say “okay but asexual people aren’t oppressed”
How even the fuck
Aphobes and other kinds of exclusionists don’t care about the truth, they care only about their own fear. That’s how.
Even if we haven’t talked, I’d love to meet y’all. ♥♥
This means the absolute world to me! Please, feel free to talk to me whenever!!! You are an absolute GEM!!! I would like to tag @sarcasmismyfirstlove@notsocloverusername@thelaststation-james@cuddlysteven@comicbooklover@milkywayheartcupcake@amnahs9695@nerdpride77@boosyboo9206 @frida-marie and literally anyone who has ever followed me, messaged me, left a comment, liked or reblogged my stuff is already considered my friend 🙂 I love you all and please feel free to message me anytime!! I really really love talking to you guys (i tell people all the time about you guys and I always refer to you as my Tumblr friends haha) Lots and lots of love ❤ ❤ 😀
griffin mcelroy is such a Good Dude and here’s why
he’s a cohost of a podcast turned tv show with his two brothers, Justin and Travis, and the podcast is My Brother, My Brother and Me
he also has a podcast with his brothers and their dad, Clint, called The Adventure Zone, all about D&D and tabletop games in general
he also does two podcasts with his wife Rachel! these are Wonderful! and Rose Buddies. the first is a general sort of thing talking about things that make them happy, and Rose Buddies was a Bachelor-themed podcast (Rose Buddies became Wonderful!)
most notably, he and Justin do a show called Monster Factory where they mess around in character creators and sometimes hack into the games in general just for fun
he has a kid named Henry and his nickname is Hank. yes. hank mcelroy.
these boys are SUPER inclusive and try their best to include LGBTQ+ and multicultural characters and themes in their work!
there are a lot of LGBTQ+ characters in The Adventure Zone!
Taako (Justin’s player character for the Balance arc) being gay and having a relationship with a male NPC named Kravitz (with Clint having coined the ship name!)
there is a lesbian NPC couple that gets a fair bit of attention
the lesbians get a tragic ending, but Griffin has since stated that he regrets that he did that
Aubrey (Travis’s player character in Amnesty) has been stated to have interest in women
Lup (a main NPC in the Balance arc) is a trans woman that has been transitioning since she was very young
Angus McDonald (a main NPC in the Balance arc) is all but confirmed Jewish as he has said “Happy Hannukah”
there are NPCs that use they/them pronouns
there’s a polyamorous NPC with multiple husbands and wives
one of Taako’s spells creates a magical nonbinary unicorn named Garyl.
one of the creators of the universe in the Balance arc is nonbinary
there is a wrestler that identifies as female with a beard
i could list the rest of them but this would be incredibly long
a lot of the music in The Adventure Zone was created by Griffin and he had initially had little to NO experience in music
keep in mind that the soundtrack raised roughly $19,000 for charity!!!!
what i’m saying is that all the McElroys are good and Griffin is one of the only 4 men I would trust with my life (the other three being Justin, Travis, and Clint)
“Salt and Pepper Diner is John Mulaney’s funniest bit” is Xanax/Prostate Exam erasure and I will not stand for it
The overlooking of “The One Thing You Can’t Replace” is a criminal act.
LISTEN, I WAS JUST WATCHING JOHN MULANEY AND I RAISE YOU
HOW COULD YOU NOT SAY DELTA AIRLINES????
Bill Clinton Never Forgets A Bitch, Ever
The responses to this post have been so amazing because it’s reminded me, and I’m sure many others, of just how many hilarious bits John Mulaney has other than s&pd
okay, but eighth graders
….. could be a nursery.
being 12 years old on anotger continent is a great alibi
“Why buy the cow, question mark?”
THAT TALL CHILD LOOKS TERRIBLE
And then. He ordered oneblack coffee for himself.
And kept driving.
LOOK AT THAT HIGH WAISTED MAN, HE GOT FEMININE HIPS
❤️💓❤️💞❤️💗❤️💕❤️💘❤️💝❤️💖❤️💟❤️💗❤️💖❤️💖❤️💝❤️💞❤️💕❤️💓❤️💛💚💙💜💖iconic! goddess! im in love! you’re so cute girlfriend! be my straight wife! but only straight wife because I don’t want your husband Kevin to be mad and then that’ll ruin your marriage and your kids won’t be able to go to soccer practice anymore and then you’ll no longer be a soccer mom which honestly is the only thing going for you babe 😊😊😊 lov u too!
thanks debbie!!!! 😍❤️❣️💗💕💝🤗 hows ur mediocre sex life with your husband or did that finally die like ur marriage
oh Helen you’re so funny 😂😂❤️❤️. Everyone knows me and my husband just came back from a cruise in Europe 😍 and are expecting 👶 and are never happier💏. Imagine that even when I was cruising from Italy 🇮🇹 to France 🇫🇷 I heard that your husband was cheating on you with your babysitter 🤔🤔. How’s that’s going for you sweetie🤗? Remember if you need anything I’m here for you, straight wife 😊❤️💓🤗
Debbie 😳🤧 We didn’t want to tell you 🤭 but those were lies fabricated by your husband 😮because he’s been in love with me ‼️ for five years now 💞💕. So glad for your baby, straight wife🤰🏻!!!! I hope it doesnt take after its mother 🧟♀️😨💖🤗
Oh no honey 🍯 😂😂😂 actually. Your husband was cheating on you with my husband 😂😂😂 but my lovely Josh 💗💗💗 confessed to me about how your sinful husband was in love with his 🍆 😳 and I forgave him. and now because we’ve got rid of your sinful ways we’re more honest and in love 😍 ❤️ 💗with each other. Maybe check who told you those lies you’re spewing, maybe it’s an other one of those sinful gays. 😂😂 ofc I’m not homophobic🌈. I love love ❤️❤️❤️ especially me and Josh’s love ❤️❤️❤️ dw our baby will grow up to be the most amazing, kind and genius child, straight wife 🤗❤️💕
Debbie. Deborah. Sweaty. Your husband is gay 😳😳. Remember ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 love is love 🏳️🌈 and your husband 🧔🏽 loves men 🗣🗣. And while we’re at it 👀, the entire block knows that your baby 👶🏻 isn’t actually his 🙈🙈. Oh, and thanks 💯 for the cupcakes at the PTA meeting 🍰; my mouth was feeling a little too wet 💦 and they really helped dry that problem RIGHT UP 😩😩
Oh Helen. Helena. Babydoll 😂❤️❤️❤️. The only gay 🌈🌈🌈 here is your husband 🍆 and your slut of a daughter, Macey ✂️😳! Who I saw kissing the Jeffered’s daughter behind the local Walmart 😮😦! Takes after her father I see 😈👀❓Maybe your mouth was dry because of your lies not my amazing cupcakes which were better than your shitty casserole 😊. It didn’t even have pepper, god you’re so white and racist! 😂😂👏👏🤔🤔 The entire block knows that because my baby was sperm implanted due to my husband’s health issues you insensitive bitch! 🚫😔 I’m not a cheater like you 📝 and your sinful family 👀. Much Love, your straight wife🤗❤️
vikings made their woman handle the finances because they thought math is witchcraft
During a military campaign, Vlad the Impaler, the basis for Dracula, once pulled his troops out of a major engagement in a valley at dusk so that the sun was in their enemies’ eyes. Once they were over the hill, they set loose a bunch of rabid bats who flew away from the sun (towards the enemy) and attacked them, leading to significant infection in their ranks, and Vlad’s eventual victory. Because of how the bats appeared from where Vlad’s soldiers appeared to be at dusk, myth stated that the soldiers turned into bats at night, which is where the “Dracula can change into a bat” thing came from.
raphael, the renaissance painter, literally fucked himself to death
during the Ottoman Empire, the Sultan Ibrahim I had 280 of his concubines drowned in the ocean after ONE of them slept with another man.
The earths carbon levels fell by 700 million tons because Genghis Khan killed so many people
King James (the one known for revising the Bible) liked to watch women give birth. That’s where the “tradition” of women laying on their backs to give birth comes from.
Previous to that it was common for women to have chairs with holes in them and straw underneath, so they could sit on this special chair and let gravity help with the birthing process.
Spicy foods were thought to increase libido and cause children to masturbate. To prevent kids from touching themselves at night, a man named Kellogg invented the blandest combination of cereals, marketed it at kids, and called it Corn Flakes
At the Battle of Gettysburg during the American Civil War, a small group of Union soldiers had run out of ammo against a large group of the Confederate Army. In a panic, the Union soldiers sprinted at them, screaming, with only bayonets drawn. The entire Confederate Army that was present turned and ran away in fear, not knowing that they had literally no ammunition.
When the Roman Emperor Caligula went to invade Britain he stood on the coast of Gaul with his army and suddenly declared war on Neptune, God of the Sea. He had his men collect sea shells from the shore as “spoils from the Ocean”.
Oh and he appointed his horse to the senate.
During the Austro-Prussian war of 1868, Liechtenstein sent over an army of 80 people, but ended up coming back with 81 people because they befriended a guy on the other side.
People refused to send art and sculptures to be displayed at the Chicago World’s Fair because of Chicago’s history with fire. They had to fireproof the Fine Arts building to get people to agree to loan them their art. A year after the fair closed most of the grounds were destroyed by fire but the Fine Arts building survived. It’s now the Museum of Science and Industry.
The carbon emissions thing from Ghenghis Khan is not the whole story. He also planted trees wherever he conquered land because he liked trees and thought they were important. He conquered enough to make an impact on the global climate.
Radu III, brother of Vlad III( Vlad the Impaler) nearly killed Mehmed II, the future Sultan of the Ottoman’s, after Mehmed invited him up to his chambers. Radu, seemingly unaware that the offer was sexual in nature, was startled when Mehmed embraced and then tried to kiss him. Radu stabbed the prince in the leg, then ran and hid in a tree. They later became lovers, and maintained a relationship for the rest of their lives
Just googled the last one because holy shit that’s magnificent and seemed to good to be true, but not only did it actually happen, but I also learned that radu was known as “radu the beautiful”
fun date idea: stab him in the leg
the wedding tradition that grooms stand to the left of their brides was brought on by the idea of right handed grooms holding swords and protecting their brides from other men that would try to steal his fly girl. he would literally stab them and fight them to death during the wedding in order to keep his wife. fuckin metal
Acephobia in the LGBT+ Community from the documentary (A)sexuality.
It is just…so fucking weird how threatened people feel when it comes to Asexuality. I still can’t wrap my mind around it.
I’m so happy this post is being reblogged by LBGT+ people who aren’t asexual. I keep on reading posts by non-ace LGBT+ people of support to the ace community, and of being stunned by this reaction by a movement which should know better than to judge. AND THAT MAKES THIS ACE SO FREAKING HAPPY. The woman in the first photo expresses my sentiment. I know I belong in the queer/LGBTQIA movement. I want to belong. But I just don’t know if I’m welcome. I’m so happy that there are so many people on Tumblr who do not fall into the catagory of outright refusal of asexuality.
I know not a lot of people understand asexuality. And I know there’s confusion about it, about our experiences, and about how we fit in the movement. But let’s talk about this. Let’s have this conversation.
I mostly don’t delve into the ace tags, but I hear there’s a lot of ace-hate that and I really don’t get it. I don’t understand how asexuality is threatening.
You know what I (as a queer ace-spectrum person) find most threatening? Getting unwanted sexual unwanted advances from both queer and straight people. I’ve gotten them from people of all spectrums and it always makes me profoundly uncomfortable, and often unsafe. It just boggles my mind how people are upset by the concept of asexuality. That’s like getting really mad at someone who isn’t hungry. What’s the point? Just shut up eat your own sandwich. (And stop chewing on me.)
Wow, the fuck the people in those images.
Nobody has the right to disrespect anybody else’s sense of self. It may not be for, you but that does not give you the right to be an asshole.
We really need to push more for LGBTQIA+ to be a standard,instead of just LGBT, especially considering that even the B and T are already invisible in much of the community.
Not supporting some of us = not supporting all of us.
Not supporting some of us = not supporting all of us.
It really, really does bear repeating.
I couldn’t be further from ace, but for serious.
If we’re not in this together, we’re not in this at all.
This makes me so angry. I have friends who are ace, and they are just as much a part of the queer community as I am.
We need to embrace asexuality and treat it with the respect that it deserves.