pieforbittle:

Things bitty has totally 700% googled at 2am and promptly deleted from his search history:
*How do I put protein powder into baked goods and not have it taste like a hockey player that hasn’t showered in a week has rubbed them in his ass crack?
*what’s a bad bob
*Am I still gay if I would jump on the chance to have Beyonce’s babies?
*How to set a couch on fire and make it look like an accident and also not burn the house down
*Am I the mom friend which was promptly followed by
*how to stop being the mom freind
*Really gay hair cuts that won’t alert your parents to the fact that you’re about as straight as Liberace
* How is jack Zimmermann’s jaw line possible
*Is it possible to die and still be alive (after lemonade was released)
*What to do when squats aren’t enough to get the booty I deserve
*Does my stuffed bunny know I love him
*Forums for people who have been personally victimized by jack Zimmermann’s butt