too many, strap in kids we’re going in hard today

• “a song is often a prelude… to a dick. and if you ever have trouble, just remember this song-”
• the entirety of You’ve Gotta Go
• honey. i can hear what dogs can hear. i can fly. JACK BAUER CAN FLY.
• i’m bruce man. shit, i mean bat wayne. FUCK
• “what’s that name” TIGER FUCKER “NO!”
• i am woman, hear me SMASH.
• What are you? Nuts? Beautiful? More like “supermegafoxyawesomehot”!
• i consider myself to be a very reasonable uptight bitch.
• oH yOu ThInK yOu’Re BeTtEr ThAn Me JuSt BeCaUsE yOu CaN rEaD? wElL tHeN gEt OuT oF mY bOoKsToRe
• those are stretch marks. they happen.
• what the HELL is a HUFFLEPUFF
• not everyone’s perfect like me. that’s why i’m holding out for a 10. because i’m worth it.
• Nice try, you’ve got an F on your shirt, dumbass.
• “you guys. go get snacks- oh shit we barricaded the door”
• it’s just like, i can’t get her out of my head, and every time i look at her i get these pains in my chest and i just know it’s her fault, that bitch
• I AM STILL IN A RAGE AND THIS IS STILL THE MADDEST I HAVE EVER BEEN.
• “i wanna be a modern dancer!” that’s a super weird thing to say that came out of nowhere! 😀
• i’m sorry but all we can offer you at T.G.I. Fridays is lukewarm service and a forced fun atmosphere!
• God’s not up here. Only Batman.
• MuGgLeS hAvE tHeIr PlAcE. mUdBlOoDs HaVe ThEiR pLaCe. AnD sO dO yOuR cLoThEs. NaMeLy, In A dReSsEr!!!
• you’d think killing people would make people like you… but it doesn’t………… it just makes people dead
• HE IS LORD. DUCK IS LORD.
• literally all of sweet tooth’s candy based puns
• Essentially the entirety of Pays to Be an Animal
• what is it, snoop dogg? “you’ve got a phone call, mothafucka.”
• any time that Denise says “i’m your mommy now” in Firebringer
• FIRESHITTER FIRESHITTER FIRESHITTER
• but how do i kill the children. i don’t want to hurt them.
• I’m not dangerous! And I’m also not homeless… anymore.
• three cheers for captain marvel!
• Jeff Blim is essentially a goldmine, he’s so good, and yes, this is just a vague @ the scene where he acts out both of Aladdin’s conflicting personalities
• MOM???? YOU’RE DATING CEDRIC????????
• I’m just your everyday, working class, blue collar gay guy with a beard.
• sometimes you accidentally kill your whole family.
• Mrs. Robinson, you’re trying to seduce me.
• we TRUSTED YOU ZAZZALIL!
• who the fuck are you
• anything that Smelly-Balls says. Comedy gold.
• drop the attitude harry potter. you’re acting like Garfield on a Monday.
• Darren: >:o
• I once had a flirtatious relationship with a stack of hay, but that was kinda strange because that stack of hay was my cousin.
• a horse ate my cousin. me and horses got a feud.
• that thing is an R-O-B-O-T
• you can’t fool me with numbers, Krayonder
• you could go next door and see something professional, we wouldn’t blame you a bit, sitting through this oreSHIT